Am I Toxic Quiz
While learning about toxic relationships, we may have the unpleasant surprise of recognizing ourselves in certain characteristics… We start wondering if, in the end, we are not toxic persons ourselves.
The definition of a toxic person is based on your tolerance threshold with regard to the person’s behavior towards you.
It is therefore necessary to be able to analyze your feelings and to detect those which seem so uncomfortable to you, that you feel that there is something wrong with this person. This means that a toxic person can be toxic for you, but not for everyone.
It can be agreed that a person is toxic when they do not meet your personal standards of well-being and begins to have a negative impact on your thinking, your actions or your relationships with other people in your social circle. Often, a toxic person is not aware of their condition and this is part of the reason why they continue to behave the same way.
Types of Toxic People
Some people are considered toxic because they have personality disorders. They have built themselves, over the years, through a system of thoughts and actions that do not allow them to establish healthy relationships with those around them. Here are the four types of personality.
1- The narcissistic personality
Toxic narcissists can be recognized by their grandiose self-image, which manifests itself in a massive need to be admired.
-Have an exaggerated and unfounded perception of their importance and talents.
-Are often obsessed with unlimited fantasies of success, influence, power, intelligence, beauty, or perfect love.
-They often display pride or even arrogance and believe that they are special and unique, that they deserve more than others, that they have special rights because of their superiority.
-They exploit others to achieve their own goals and suffer little or no guilt because of limited empathy.
-They tend to devalue others in order to shine socially.
2- Antisocial personality
In general, these toxic people have a strong impulsivity that is often the source of behavioral problems.
Disregard for others and standards may to a lesser extent refer to an inability to respect and honor obligations, agreements or promises made to others.
The toxic elements of the antisocial personality refer to a lack of consideration for others and an instability of mood, which can manifest itself in particular within the couple or the family by angry outbursts that are triggered by the slightest frustration.
3- Borderline Personality
As the fear of abandonment and loss of love is central to this mode of functioning, the person must constantly control the other person to the point of exerting a real hold over them.
The toxic personality exerts a permanent control on its surroundings. They have relationships tinged with emotional dependence, but also with defenses against this perceived dependence.
The partner is therefore often trapped in a vicious circle in which phases of fusion and intensity alternate with phases of irritability. In the same way, the relationship with the identity and the self-image is disturbed and fluctuating.
4- Paranoid Personality
The disorder is primarily expressed by a distrust and suspicion of others, based on the intimate belief that others are there primarily to hurt, exploit, harm or deceive them.
It manifests itself in unwarranted concern and doubt about the trustworthiness of their friends, colleagues or partner.
There are many signs that help identify the disorder and identify people with this toxic personality:
-Reluctance to confide for fear that the information or secrets will be used against them.
-A persistent grudge for the slightest things.
-Lack of forgiveness.
In general, paranoid personalities will have a tendency to misinterpret insignificant remarks or events.
Tips on how to stop being toxic
You need to work on yourself if you feel that others are avoiding you or if you realize that you are manipulating others to get what you want. Here are some tips to help you:
-Become aware of your “toxicity”: this is the first step that you will allow to change and become a better person.
-Be ready to change: by putting actions in place and by being persistent.
-Work on your empathy: developing your empathy with others is one of the first things to do. Being able to put yourself in the other person’s shoes will foster social ties. Your relationships with others will also be healthier, more sustainable and on an equal footing.
-Stimulate social intelligence (understanding others): this aspect is very much linked to the empathy mentioned above. It is about learning to relate to others with respect.
-Being flexible: toxic people generally lack flexibility in their way of thinking and acting. This is a point to improve by modifying one’s thoughts to make them more flexible.
-Be self-critical: analyze your strengths and weaknesses in order to know what you should focus on.
-Don’t hesitate to ask for help: facing your toxic side alone can be difficult. Don’t hesitate to ask for help from a professional if you feel the need.